264 - Reframing and Repairing Our Relationship to Power With Amanda Aguilera, The Right Use of Power Institute

“Most people think about power as a commodity, like something you can get or lose. And when we think about power in that way, the natural consequence of that is scarcity.” - Dr. Amanda Aguilera 

Therapists have issues with power. If you’re a therapist and have taken that assessment personally, good. As therapists, we’re famous for not doing our own work, so, of course, we shy away from acknowledging that we hold any power at all. Worse, we conflate power and cruelty, an assumption that keeps us mired in fear and inaction. But now that we’ve identified the issue, we can transform it. Dr. Amanda Aguilera is one of my favorite facilitators for this kind of work. She’s the executive director of The Right Use Of Power Institute (RUPI), a global non-profit that helps people utilize their power with “awareness, wisdom, compassion, and skill.” 

I've been training with RUPI for a couple of months now and appreciate their coursework for filling in many of the gaps in my anti-racism journey. I’m also thrilled to report that the entire organization is thoroughly aligned with the vision set forth by its founder, Dr. Cedar Barstow, to inspire and support anyone who wants to use their power in the most ethical way possible. “I feel really honored to be able to do this work in the world, to carry on her legacy and build on it,” says Amanda. 

Reframing our relationship to power begins with understanding. What, exactly, is power? Simply defined, it is “the capacity or ability to direct or influence the behavior of others or the course of events.” And, as Amanda points out, it’s inherently neutral. The scarcity mindset (a favorite tool of capitalism) has assigned an outsized value to power, changing it from a natural consequence to a commodity, something that must be won and wielded rather than as a fluid, impartial aspect of being in relationship with one another. “That’s why cultivating cultures of belongingness is so important because that is what helps people to connect to their own personal power, which is what helps people to be present and to do the thing that they're meant to do in the world and to be healthy,” confirms Amanda.

I’m grateful to RUPI for articulating the intricacies of the power dynamic and for creating a safe, ethical space to do our collective reparative work.  

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE

Naropa University

The NeuroAffective Relational Model - NARM™

Al-Anon

Joanna Macy

The Enneagram Institute

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Dr. Amanda Aguilera (she/her/ella) is a consultant and facilitator in the area of power-and-equity consciousness and conflict resolution. Driven by her core values of curiosity, courage, and connection, Amanda is adept at putting things together in new ways, creating visuals that help make learning more accessible, and communicating complex ideas in simple ways.

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265 - The Burnt Out Practice Owner: What Do You Do When Practice Ownership Feels Out of Alignment With Your Temperament? With David Clinton

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263 - The Burnt Out Practice Owner: How Can You Cultivate True Inclusivity and Growth? With Gabi Granoff and Evelyn Williams, Solway Psychology