161 - Alexa Silvaggio - Chocolate, Pleasure, and Loving Your Whole Self
“It doesn't matter what your purpose is; it could be a doctor or a dog mom. Doesn't matter. But you're not gonna do it wholeheartedly if you're obsessing about the size of your thighs.” ~Alexa Silvaggio
Chocolate and ketamine.
Yes, that would be a fantastic title for a double album! Instead, they’re the ingredients for a vibe-altering conversation with wellness entrepreneur and chocolatier Alexa Silvaggio. As CEO of Savage Chocolates, she helps people cultivate an experience of pleasure and presence through chocolate. BTW: I don’t even like chocolate that much, and I ate ALL the damn Savage chocolate sent my way; it’s that good!
Anyhoo, back to Alexa. She’s also a podcast host and, ahem, guess who’s already made an appearance on her show. It’s me! Alexa believes in pleasure done well, pleasure done mindfully. “I don't have any interest in consuming something that leaves me feeling worse than when I started,” she says. That goes as much for people and experiences as it does food.
Alexa’s affinity for pleasure - so often treated as a dirty word and frivolous pursuit in Western culture - was born out of the years she spent restricting herself into an eating disorder. Alexa began internalizing both the conspicuous and covert messages about body shape and size at a young age, essentially disappearing in an attempt to become more valuable. “You are worth more if you lose yourself completely,” she says of mainly Western, capitalistic beauty standards. Ouch. Yeah, that’s gonna leave a mark. And it did. The loop of self-hatred played in Alexa’s head nonstop throughout college until her sister finally helped her hit stop.
There’s a spiritual quality with which Alexa talks about starvation - of the body, of the soul. Likewise, the practices and methods she’s leaned on along her healing journey. Yoga connected her to the quiet wisdom of the body after years of abuse. Later, ayahuasca provided a different mind-body integration, allowing Alexa to truly see herself as separate from her body and appreciate the beauty of her “vehicle.” Alexa’s ability to ground these utterly personal experiences in simple, moving language had yours truly in tears in the best possible way.
Y’all, I had such a soul-satisfying visit with Alexa that we didn’t even get to the healer/wounded healer questions! And I don’t even care because, instead, we unraveled several threads at once, including my decision to begin ketamine treatments, the death of Alexa’s beloved mother, and the myriad paths that reconnect us to our source.
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MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
Conversations with a Wounded Healer e134: Livia BudrysSavage
LIfecast: Head Heart Healing with Sarah Buino
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Savor Yourself: A Self-Care Workshop
Alexa Silvaggio is a wellness entrepreneur based in Los Angeles. She is a yoga instructor, writer, podcast host, retreat leader, and CEO of Savage Chocolates, a mindfulness chocolate brand. She encourages you to cultivate a more loving relationship with your body and self through all she teaches. She would love to connect with you!
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